II Chronicles 7:14

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

Sunday, July 16, 2006

All kinds of smooth...

Okay, most of you know what a leg-shaving maniac I am...but this is how bad it really is. Yesterday some friends of ours came over and we decided to go swimming. My first thought? Oh No!! I didn't do my "swimsuit" shave this morning. This prompted me to think about how many different "shaves" I have. Here's what I came up with:
#1: The Basic every-day shave. This is where you shave from the ankle to a little above the knee. You might miss a little spot here or there but it's not a biggy.
#2: The Swim-suit shave. This is where you shave from the ankle ALL the way up. This one is critical because you can't take a chance on any peek-a-boo hairs.
#3: The I-don't-have-time-for-a-shower shave. This is where you shave balancing one leg on the floor and one on the side of the bathtub using lotion. This usually produces nasty razor burn but is still better than having prickly legs.
#4: The I-have-a-sunburn shave. This shave is done with the lightest of pressure, lots of shave gel, luke-warm water and teeth gritted. If you're like me, you get goosebumps when you have a sunburn...which is the WORST possible thing when shaving.
#5: The I-wanna-get-romantic shave. Similar to the swim-suit shave, but with even more attention to detail. Starting at the big toe and with a NEW razor blade, you remove every trace of hair or stubble and then be sure to use some kind of perfumed lotion and I use baby oil too--just for that little bit of extra silky smoothness.
and finally #6: The my-kids-are-taking-a-shower-with-me shave. This one requires an extreme level of coordination, so as to not shave the head of your two-year-old who is peeking his head out from between your legs. This shave is usually done ultra-quick and usually results in patches of leg that are completely missed. It's not the shave of choice, but works in a pinch.

Are you laughing yet? It's pathetic, I know. What's worse is I actually get irritated if I do the swim-suit shave or the I-want-to-get-romantic shave and the plans get changed. Those two take a lot of work and I don't like to waste them. ha ha

Anyhow, I hope you are doing something more productive with your Sunday than I am! I am fixing to go play a game with Brooklyn since the boys are napping. Then Matt and I are going to see You, Me and Dupree tonight! yippee! I'll let you know how it is! Happy last-little-bit of weekend! Keep those legs smooth girls!!

5 comments:

Logzie said...

That was TOO funny! I agree with all of your 'shave types' but I am wondering if you really mean "ALL" in the swimsuit shave??

I have been enjoying your blog! I am a friend of AMOS and she told me about your blog. I can relate to so many of your situations with children especially and it's so nice to see that there are others out there going thru the same kinds of frusterations...but they are so worth it! Well, thanks for the laugh! I really needed it!

Jen said...

okay..to clarify. "ALL" in the swimsuit shave actually means everything within a half inch of my swimsuit. This may be too much info, but I have tried "ALL" meaning every single last one once...but WOWSERS!! its 10 times worse than prickly legs when growing back! I had to try it just so I could say I did...but it's definitely not for me!

Amos said...

Ok, so like I would've ever noticed since it was DARK out when we got in the pool. But hey thanks for the laugh and the fun time out in the country. P.S. Can we just build our house on the other side of your driveway, haha.

Logzie said...

Umm...I'll just say ...so have I...recently...and YES...it is 10 times worse and I'll never do it again. It's NOT for me either. But you gotta try everything once right? Well, maybe not everything.

KC said...

Hahaha Girl we are so much alike it is SCARY! haha I am the EXACT same way, especially when it comes to a little boy in the shower, saying "whatcha doin"? haha Those have to be quick!
Girl, you had me rolling! I really needed that tonight.
Thanks!