Pressured

So, the kids are sleeping over at grandma and grandpas tonight. We finally have the house to ourselves. We can do whatever we want. No interruptions, no distractions, no little eyes peering into the darkness that envelops our bedroom saying "what're y'all doin'?"
And yet....there is TOO MUCH PRESSURE.
The "mood" is no where to be found.
I'm here on the computer. Matt's in the other room in his recliner. We've already had the dreaded awkward talk where we both admit that neither of us really feels like it and that we're both pretty tired.
But I can't just let it go. It's been a loooooooooooooooong time since we've had a night without the kids. I can't even remember the last time. AND...in order to get her to agree to keepng both kids all night, I actually had to admit to my mom that we "NEEDED" this time alone. Gaahhhh!! How embarassing!
It's just so dang frustrating. If I just turn off my laptop, roll over and go to sleep like my body is longing to do...I'll feel like I totally wasted our one and only night. But if I go against what I feel and make a move...then I'll feel like I'm doing it just because I feel like I HAVE to. Grrrr... This is SO not how they make it look in the movies. Aren't we supposed to be tearing each others clothes off and falling onto the bed in a fit of passion--nearly sucking the lips off each other?
Man, where have THOSE days gone?
Probably packed away with my yearbooks and mini skirts and curling irons. :0)

Okay...one thing I know for certain, I don't want to spend my night on the computer. Sex or sleep--either way the computer has to be put away! Goodnight y'all!