I'm sitting here at my desk this morning doing my work for the doctors office and I look down at my pile of papers. On the top of the stack is the patient list I am currently working on and all over it is doodling that Brooklyn did yesterday.
Doodling that I yelled at her for because she used my "special" felt-tip permanent pen that I only use for special things like writing out cards, invitations, etc. and she "wasted all that ink and once it's gone, it's gone!"
omg-how stupid.
And now I really feel like a meanie because I see what she wrote which is a big flower and pretty block letters that say "Mom is Wow!"
Why am I SO HARD on her sometimes? I mean...especially yesterday, I was really tough on her about a lot of things (the doodling with my favorite pen, how she unloads the dishwasher wrong, how sloppy she is, what an awful job she does of cleaning her room, etc.)
None of those are really bad things. Maybe they're not the best qualities, but they're not bad. She is a really good girl and sometimes it seems like all I do is find things to pick on her about.
YUCK. I don't wanna be that mom.
So today, without warning, I'm gonna turn it around and at least for this one day, no griping to her about anything. I bet it will be a pleasant change of pace for both of us!
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4 comments:
Oh sweetie...you are NORMAL...that does not make it right but just know that every single Mom does this from time to time. Most just are not as brave to admit it on their blog for all to see. I give you a ton of credit for doing that because while you are feeling terrible about it...all of us other Mom's are feeling a whole lot better about ourselves right now! LOL!
Seriously, we all have those moments. Wanna hear one of mine? Granted I'm totally PMS'ing right now...we're in the car yesterday driving to Target for groceries and I'm taking the moment to worship God via a worship song. Then...my 2 oldest start bickering about a "silly band" of all things. "It's mine, no, it's mine!" Etc. Then they start to ask me..."Mom he/she won't give it to me!!!" So...I just start singing my worship music even louder (to prove a point ya know...lol!) and they are not getting it...so I did the only proper and noble thing that any good patient parent singing worship songs would do...I pushed the button to roll down the passenger side window and I took the silly band and threw it out!! Nice huh. I felt like utter crap right after I did it but right up until I did it...I felt extrememly justified!! I hate myself in those moments...it's like I feel if I really make a point about something (which in hindsight is usually something drastic and redicilious on my part) then they'll "get it" and really that's never what happens...they just end up thinking their Momma has lost it. So...not good.
But your plan is a fantastic one! Restore the day and have a good one with her today. It's a good teaching lesson that everyone makes mistakes and there is always forgiveness and restoration!!
Sounds like you could probably cut her a bit of slack here - if she is attempting to tidy her room that has to be good, even if it is not perfect. If she is emptying the dish washer without smashing half of the stuff, that has to be good. Encourage the good, discourage the not so good (doodling with your fave pen)...
It is too easy to make kids feel that everything they do is wrong.
rock chef is right, it is TOO easy to make kids feel like everything they do is wrong, and that makes us feel like crap for doing that to them. Pray for guidance and the 'fun' to come into your parenting style so its not always a reprimand, but more of a playful reminder. ps. I'm speaking to myself here too :) parenting is the hardest job in the world and its so easy to screw up. sometimes I wonder why God would allow us to cause so much damage in others? But I guess that's not the way he originally planned it . the garden was great. this world we live in is filled with sin because we first sinned, so even if we don't commit murder or adultry, gossip and mean words are still sin. God help us to not sin and to choose to do what YOU would have us do!
love you, Jen!
ahh..just re-read this post and you guys'es comments...and now I'm crying. I'm so thankful for such honest and loving friends!
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