II Chronicles 7:14

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Reality is just so...boring!

So, I was given something different for Valentines Day this year. It's called a Reality Check.
Yah...I still live in the land of fantasy fairy-tale romance. The kind you see in movies and read about in books.
And it's not just for Valentines Day. In my mind, every momentous occasion should be marked by the giving of thoughtful gifts, heart-felt sentiments and priceless, quality time with the one you love. It should be chock-full of suprise, anticipation, elation, celebration and butterflies in the stomach!
Now I realize, we do live on this earth (not in the clouds above it) so I know that EVERY holiday can't be enjoyed this way...but there are a few that just canNOT be overlooked (IMO). They are:
#1: Your birthday. This is YOUR day. The other 364 days of the year are regular days where you spend the day doing things for other people (work, cleaning, cooking, etc.). So what's so wrong with thinking that on that ONE day, it should be ALL about the birthday person? From the moment they open their eyes, til they close them to go to sleep that night, it should be one celebration after another. Yes, I think that 2 of your vacation days should be used for this. One day off for your birthday and one day off for your honey's birthday. (maybe even another day off for each childs birthday!) Of course, I've yet to meet another human being who feels this way...so it remains a fantasy to me.
#2: Your Anniversary. Wow...the day you said "I want to be with you every day for the rest of my entire existance on this earth!" HOW IN THE WORLD do people just give a simple card and go out for dinner and call that CELEBRATING? Sheesh...I give cards all year long and go out for dinner all year long...so what makes that special? I realize, I'm totally in the minority here....
#3: Valentines Day. The entire USA recognizes this as the day you show your sweetie how much you love them. People who know nothing about love go to more effort (it seems) than a lot of us who are really IN IT (love). Think back to when you were 16 and you had your first 'serious' boyfriend. Wasn't it a big deal back then to get him something special (maybe cologne or a shirt from his favorite store) and have a special date and he would usually buy you flowers and maybe a peice of fun jewlery? You always held your breath that he (or someone!) would send you something at school so it would be OBVIOUS that someone out there LOVES you. Not just 'loves' you...but LOVES you!!!

Yes...well....either those days are over--or maybe they never really existed. Maybe it's all a figment of my very lively imagination!?! All I know is that no matter how hard I try not to, I usually spend the week prior to any of these given holidays dreaming up all the possible scenarious that I am going to be surprised with. My poor family...if they DID ever want to do somethng over-the-top for me, they'd have to be DANG creative because there's rare a thing I haven't already thought of and played out in my mind! It's like a fail-proof recipe for disappointment and I buy into it every time.

So...my question is...do I need to come back to reality and realize that this is just NOT how the real world does it?? (how extremely depressing and boring!!) or....does everyone else need to read my blog and GET BUSY WITH IT and start showing each other how much they mean to one another!!!???? (why..yes...I think that sounds delightful!)
HAHA...
I think I've gone loony....

***I would just like to say, before I end this post that...YES..I USED to celebrate things like this. However, due to being surrounded by people who don't share my excitement in 24-hour celebrations, my enthusiasm has been whittled away bit by bit, year by year. I still feel just as passionate about it as I ever have...but when you go to all this work and thought to do something like this for someone and they honestly would have rathered just get a card and go out to eat...then you start realizing that maybe this is what "I" want done for me...not what other people want done for them. As we all know from reading Gary Chapmans book "The 5 Love Languages"...we all spell LOVE differently...and then some of us just spell it
LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

7 comments:

Kuckie said...

Well, as far as anniversarys, Barry and I don't really do BIG things anymore, as our anniversary falls the same week the kids go back to school, and it's on Labor Day weekend, so there are always a million plans in place that we don't want to miss. But we feel like we get to celebrate our anniversary all year long, so if we want to do a fun trip or buy something big, we call that our anniversary gift! As far as birthdays, Sheri and I believe in celebrating that all year long as well....and most importantly the ENTIRE week of our birthdays (we are 5 days apart)! Anything special we want to do is justified by "it's our birthday!". So I agree with both of those. But Valentines Day, I just can't get down with. I usually decorate the house a little bit the night before as a surprise for the kiddos, and give Barry a massage, and make some super sweet special dessert, but really, I don't need any more "stuff", and sometimes I don't want it to turn in to a $100 holiday, which can happen really easily. Plus, sometimes it's too much pressure to have to come up with all of these ideas, especially with Christmas and Kendall's birthday so close before it. So for me, I'm with ya on birthdays and anniversaries, but notsomuch on Valentines Day. Hope you had a happy one though! :)

Amy said...

Girl, I am with you on every bit of this post! I told Jason he needs to read it because you just described EXACTLY the way I feel about special days. I felt that way before we moved a bizillion miles away from our friends and family but I feel that way even more so now!!! Holidays (and birthdays ARE holidays) need to be a big deal. It's fun, it makes the person feel special and I think it's important. Jason though? Not so much. Well, actually it's not that he doesnt' feel that way it's that he works so darned much that he doesn't go anywhere to get the card or gift or whatever until the last minute. And I'm sure you know how that makes me feel. No, I don't want a last-minute gift because you didn't make time tto get a gift earlier...I want a special, heartfelt token of how you feel about me. It doesn't have to be expensive, it just has to be thoughtful and special.

Yep. I am SO with you!

Tammy said...

You're not crazy ... I agree with it all!! Celebrate, celebrate, celebrate. Those days ARE a big deal and should be celebrated as such. And you should also throw in some random "just because" celebrations. Life is too short. You SHOULD have high expectations. And it's AWESOME that you're a romantic, a dreamer. The fantasies may not always come true, but you should definitely hold on to them. XOXO

Lori Allberry said...

Hi Jen!!!

Oh sweetie, you are not crazy at all!! Not at all - I feel just as you do! But, the thing is, reality is not boring, it's just well, reality! Those other things - those are fantasies, and that's why we have them, to fantasize, right? If we didn't have fantasies with our reality - then reality would be truly, truly boring!!!! =)

xoxoxoxo
♥Lori

Lori Allberry said...

Oh, yeah, I almost forgot to tell you - I replied to your comment on my post! =)

♥Lori

KC said...

Everyone has their own opinion on this....
Frankly I tell Stephen he doesn't have to do something special for V-Day, because we should show each other love EVERY day, not just on a holiday. I'd rather be surprised "for no reason" than on a holiday when it might be expected. On a holiday it just seems like a "requirement" and not something special. But if it's a surprise, on a regular day, "just because", I find those the most special and most romatic.

We didn't give each other gifts or anything for v-day. We gave the boys some candy, but didn't surprise each other with gifts for cards or anything. We are focused on getting out of debt, and have Seth's birthday coming up in a few weeks. We decided we'd rather save what money we would have spent, and make his day extra special instead.

Rock Chef said...

We celebrate 25 years this summer - I think that this will be pretty special! My wife said she wants to buy me a silver guitar!

Hope someone reads this and takes notice for you...